A.J Murphy

(Hey I have to drop out of this too, sorry. Things have come up and I don't have the time to keep up. I would love to stay in, but ...

Diana Canoeing? There was canoeing? I thought, a bit miffed that I hadn't seen that. I shrugged. "Oh well, I guess i'll head on over to writing or climbing." I ...

Diana I made my way down another dirt trail from my cabin, I had overslept, something I usually don't do, and skipped breakfast. I decided to take the nice scenic ...

My first short story! This is a bit dark, and I don't usually write things like this, but I hope it's alright. Do or do not? The air was filled ...

I think this is a very good start. What i would like to note has already been noted before, in the other critiques. Continue with this. The way you wrote ...

Diana I lugged my duffel bag over my shoulder. Somewhat nervous about this camp, and if people would accept me. While walking sown the dirt trail to my cabin I ...

(Sorry it took so long for me to post the pro, I hope it isn't to late.) Name: Diana Thomson Gender: female Age: 16 Picture: (best pic I could get) ...

Avery I swam near the girl who had healed Cate. "Thank you." I said graciously, with an almost apologetic sound in my voice. She glanced over at me, wary of ...

This sounds like fun, I might post a pro later

(remember Eden is the psychic.) Eden psychic telekinetic "Come let's go for a walk." I offered Charlie. He shrugged and walked after me. "About what you said. About us taking ...

Avery The underwater city surely was a sight to behold. It went against everything science had ever taught me, which I really didn't mind. I swam back up with Angler ...

Eden Psychic Telekinetic I had only taken a few steps out of Charlie's tent when common sense hit me like a wave, guilt traveling along with it. I acted like ...

Eden psychic telekinetic The vision poured into my mind. I watched it unfold before me, a spectator to the scene. It wasn't hard for the vision to be processed into ...

Eve Enchantress I heard the scream from Charlie’s tent. When I got there I saw Nick and Else leave to go work on their circus act. I went into his ...

Eden psychic telekinetic Eve had unpaked the few things we had. I took my violin and made by way to the outskirts of the camp. Finding a place of solitude ...